I will not blame Sushant Singh Rajput for the extreme step he took.
we do not know the battles he was fighting outside and within.
often the enemies outside of us are easier to win but the inner demons
multiply faster than cancer cells.
I as a daughter, sister, parent and friend offered counselling to help
fight negativity at many stages.
but I felt the resolve to talk more about it after I encountered the
same in my house
My daughter is a very sensitive, kind and a giving human being.
she faced discrimination, exploitation and envy of the company she moves
in.
Many times, she came back to me and cried, mom why do they do this to
me. why do they bully me for my colour, for my hair?
why are my so-called friends unhappy and taunt me when I get good marks
or I win a trophy in sports. They envy me even for having pets.
Somewhere I as a mother was victimising and humiliating her for
underperformance in studies, I dumped my ambitions on her and bragged about it
when she couldn’t meet my expectations, this added to the deteriorating
self-concept.
I realised that all these were making her very pessimistic about life
and the beauty of it, she felt it is worthless to live as nobody is happy with
her and no one likes her.
she felt suffocated and stifled. She said she did not derive any joy out
of life. it is stress, pain and hurt everywhere. Added to this there were
teenage infatuations and betrayals.
Other than parents and home there is no safe and comfortable
place.
That’s when I realised the damage we were doing to her psyche.
I started speaking to her about harsh and rude facts of life
- There are no best friends,
people evolve, the dynamics change hence two people may not feel the same
for each other forever and it is perfectly ok. Not just our friends but we
all change.
- We have to get into a fight
or an argument only based on our ability to battle it out, never bank on
somebody’s support before you start a battle
- Accept that the world is an
unfair place in the short term but in the long run, the wrong will be exposed
as everyone cannot be fooled all the time.
- We might be chasing
something now thinking it to be the ultimate happiness of our life but
tomorrow the same object may become the reason for our downfall. so be
happy when you don't get something you are very passionate about
- In this larger scheme of
things at play we don’t know what is good/bad for us.
- Look at life as an
opportunity to serve. When all the ways to keep yourselves happy see a
dead-end, realise that you are born to serve and not to seek.
- By helping someone you are
leaving an obligation on the creation, do not hesitate to offer help even
if the one receiving is never returning it.
- At the same time Never go
out of the way to help anyone, do not indulge in self-deprivation, it is
ok to fall in love, it is ok if someone cheats on you, betrayals sometimes
come as a blessing.
- Do not make a coterie of
friends and limit your interactions to them only. Don’t be a part of a
lobby, it will crush your individuality and your identity. Meet many
people, listen to them, understand perspectives. Read, write, make
opinions destroy them make newer ones, don’t be rigid, don’t have a fixed
ideology, let everything evolve.
- It is better to fail than to
be a bootlicker. If you deserve something, not even gods have the power to
stop it from coming to you. What you think is good for you is not always
good. Let things slip away. The job of Failure is to facilitate something
big coming your way.
- Do not submerge yourself
under hype and expectations. “YOU CAN DO ” attitude is good but the best
attitude is to be realistic. We all have limitations and strengths. Live
in reality, do self-talk, allow the chaos within to settle down, be
grounded in your head.
- One of the easiest ways for
your rivals to put you down is to separate you from your
companions/friends/teammates “DIVIDE AND RULE”, but if you invested in
people and relations, believe me, no one will leave your side.
- The second easiest way to
put down a lady is “CHARACTER ASSASSINATION”. I have seen this happening
with every second lady, if you cannot defeat her malign her, she will
retreat. Do not fall to this ploy ever. The more they will try to put you
down, stand your ground. Your resilience and strength will weaken them
from within.
Dear Sushant
You were mistaken if you thought Karan Johar, Alia Bhatt
nexus/lobby/coterie existed only in Bollywood.
A Karan Johar/Alia Bhatt clone is running an unholy lobby of bootlickers
in every big and small organisation.
The undeserving move up the ladder because
they have learnt very early in life
to play sidekicks, surrender their self-esteem, give up every trace of
self-pride and ego for petty gains.
There are politics at every place where there is an assembly of more
than 2 men.
Amidst all this, all you were required to do was work hard, remain
focussed on your goals.
Online streaming channels were bringing a death knell to the big stars
and big project from huge production houses.
Post covid19 era, there is no space for mega movies, even the megastars
will vie for a space on the small screen.
you should have stayed back to see the Tamesha unfold.
This was your time to make a foray into the drawing rooms through web
series.
Karan johar's and big khans of the world are going to be buried under
their stardom in the days to come.
That vile fellow hosting nasty shows, making a mockery of others over
coffee, giggling, gossiping and calculatedly creating questionnaires to put
down others did not deserve the sacrifice you made.
Creation was going to show him his true place in the days to come.
Imagine the kind of legacy he will leave behind for his children; do you think
a person can thrive on wealth alone.
Sushant You got buried under the hype you created around yourself as a
star of 70 mm, built false expectations around yourself.
You know we all go through these suicidal phases, but what stops us is
our loved ones, our dependants, as our life doesn’t belong just to us but to
everyone associated with us, it is selfish to give up. It is ok to take a step
back reassess the situation and start all over again.
It is NOT EASY to kill oneself and I am sure it all happened in a moment
of weakness, see how the world has moved ON whereas you left behind infinite
grief for your father. He will not be a normal person anymore. you should have
lit his pyre and not vice versa.
It is a choice you made, a decision you took and as the audience of your
cinema, all we can do is respect it.
Rest in peace Sushant, I hope you landed in a better place, but if you
can manage, then do come into the dreams of people who are going through a
similar phase to give them some courage to fight it out and not give up.
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