This too shall pass, Mr Khan.

 This too shall pass, Mr Khan.

_______________________

I have a 23-year-old son and a 17-year-old daughter, so Aryan Khan's news is relatable.

We all more or less give the same upbringing to our children.

Take care of their food, health and educational needs. Each of us tends to our children's specific emotional, sensitive, and spiritual needs differently.

And materialistic necessities are taken care of depending on our financial stability. I agree that some parents are stingy and others are very indulgent. In my experience, kids from both backdrops did exceptionally well. The argument put forward by permissive parents is that you show your children the best of this world to make them ambitious and aspirational to seek an equivalent life. The argument put forward by stingy parents is, that to keep the fire in the belly burning; a starved kid will be more ambitious than the satiated one.

There are working mothers and housewives, and children born to both types are successful. Hence, this could never become a parameter in my experience of watching successful parenting.

There are ultra-modern parents with Western lifestyles and conservative, orthodox parents on the other hand. Both groups nurtured industrialists, doctors and engineers who made it big for themselves and their parents.

Near-perfect couples couldn't raise flawless children, And perfect, triumphant children never had sound parents.

These deliberations always made me seek the answers to "What is the formula for good parenting".

I could never find one.

Dear SRK, don't feel let down by all the accusations coming your way of lousy parenting; don't appear belittled or shamed because of your son's wrongdoing. As a father, you have always gone ahead and provided the best for your son. This society is equally responsible and to be blamed for every wrong in our surroundings.

Children are not raised just by their progenitors but by our surroundings' social, familial, political, educational, spiritual, economic, and moral uprightness of this civilisation has an equal impact on them during their growing up years.

Your son harmed himself; he did not go out to hurt others; he did not steal, cheat, ditch, snatch, damage or wreck others. He is often better than people who revel in all or some of this.

It is OK; children make mistakes. Sometimes, this experience will bring a significant transformation, a stirring within that leads to a great determination to defeat all the negativity and prove one's worth.

To me, the losers in this game are those people seeing an opportunity to put you and your family down, digging up the repository of your family pictures and posting nasty comments beneath.

Youu are a diligent person who made it big on your labour and merit; as a couple, you withstood misfortunes to build your empire.

It would be best if you didn't let these minor incidents disturb you; by getting worried, you are playing into the hands of your nemesis.

Your son has seen you work hard and watch you scale the heights one by one, going from nobody to the most sought-after hero.

I am sure sitting in that office, his mind is running him through past to present, making him realise his folly and foolishness in falling prey to drugs making it a public farce. He is at the lowest morale; he needs help, not public scrutiny; he needs solace, not media trial.

We, the parents of teenage children, should show empathy because we never know what our children are doing in the next room. A scandal can break out of a minor incident, and vested interests may give air to the rumours, escalating them to a billion times their size.

Never take time and good luck for granted. We never know which misfortune awaits us at the next bend of the road. It pays to be kind and concerned. We lose nothing by participating in the pains, trials and tribulations of people around us. Similar favours may not be returned to us when needed, but this creation watching us will send help through other sources.

It is a human tendency to feel satisfied when people who harmed us face the wrath of time. Let us try inchmeal to rise above this petty stuff to produce greater good and joy for ourselves by participating in the suffering of people known or unknown to us.

We can always avoid people who repel us but never wish harm to them.

So, Mr Khan, in conclusion, there is no one correct universal method or formula for good parenting; rogue kids turn responsible in later years, and well-brought-up kids become criminals.

Your son Aryan will bounce back from these lows to make you proud one day, not far away from today.

GODSPEED.