Writing a memoir On the eve of my 41st Birthday...
The last birthday at my parents' home was a big affair, a farewell kind of thing... brother teased, saying, maybe this will be the last grandest celebration of your life...
1st birthday after Shaadi
The man is on a fellowship program, and I am at in law place, waiting to join him... he calls the landline at 9:01 pm (as std rates were cheaper after 9), mom-in-law talks first, then dad ... his elder brother could sense my anxiety, and he gets me on to the line with the man bypassing others, and he was the one who remembered my birthday and brought sweets home on the way back from his office.. it was just a plain happy birthday greeting from the man, my hopes, dream of a fairy tale birthday, surprise gift all washed out in an unromantic moment ... I retired to my room and slept weeping that night.... when I met him later that week, I assumed he will show a lot of remorse for missing an opportunity to celebrate my birthday (in his meager income) but to my surprise, no sign of any such guilt,
My dad used to praise this man so much that I was convinced that my dad could not read, understand, and assess people!
The next Birthday too, was uneventful, and so was the next which apparently fell on a Sunday, I had some hopes that he would make it memorable for me, but he was given Sunday duty reasoning the shortage of manpower at the CORPORATE hospital. My heart broke into pieces.
The last birthday at my parents' home was a big affair, a farewell kind of thing... brother teased, saying, maybe this will be the last grandest celebration of your life...
1st birthday after Shaadi
The man is on a fellowship program, and I am at in law place, waiting to join him... he calls the landline at 9:01 pm (as std rates were cheaper after 9), mom-in-law talks first, then dad ... his elder brother could sense my anxiety, and he gets me on to the line with the man bypassing others, and he was the one who remembered my birthday and brought sweets home on the way back from his office.. it was just a plain happy birthday greeting from the man, my hopes, dream of a fairy tale birthday, surprise gift all washed out in an unromantic moment ... I retired to my room and slept weeping that night.... when I met him later that week, I assumed he will show a lot of remorse for missing an opportunity to celebrate my birthday (in his meager income) but to my surprise, no sign of any such guilt,
My dad used to praise this man so much that I was convinced that my dad could not read, understand, and assess people!
The next Birthday too, was uneventful, and so was the next which apparently fell on a Sunday, I had some hopes that he would make it memorable for me, but he was given Sunday duty reasoning the shortage of manpower at the CORPORATE hospital. My heart broke into pieces.
The next few birthdays too had the same dry spell; I eventually stopped fantasizing about grand birthday celebrations, Sometimes neighbours took the initiative, and other times, friends tried to make it an occasion for me, but the first move was never made by him.
Birthday gifts were always books; I used to envy friends who got expensive gifts, luxury holidays, and grand parties as birthday packages.
But After 2 decades of life with him, I learnt that Celebration is not just pomp and splendour, it cannot be measured materialistically, celebration is joyfulness which should not be constrained to limited days.
But After 2 decades of life with him, I learnt that Celebration is not just pomp and splendour, it cannot be measured materialistically, celebration is joyfulness which should not be constrained to limited days.
Celebrate life; celebrate the moments, the opportunities, the struggles, the goals, the promise, the achievement, the beauty, the giving.
THE GREATEST GIFT FOR THIS LIFETIME IS HE AND HIS COMPANIONSHIP.
I realize that this life has become a celebration for me because of the joys following our coming together. I have started enjoying this transformation. I believe God created him to help me evolve into the person he intends me to be and my evolution in the true sense has started.
Thank you all... family, friends, colleagues, partners, associates, for being a part of another good year of my life.
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